Discovering your True Self in the New Year

This is the time of year when you may be focusing on your outward appearance and considering ways to start a new eating plan, become more physically active, or improve your home.

Or maybe it’s time  to weed through the tangled garden of your relationships with your family and friends to decide which could use more water and nurturing compared to which need to be pruned back further.

While this outward focus is a good time for reflecting on what your values and goals are for the New Year ahead, it’s also valuable to consider whether your inner self is in alignment with your true values and whether you are moving forward in a healthy direction.

In her book, “On Becoming Fearless” Arianna Huffington writes about how essential it is that we give up the need for outward approval in order to truly identify what is most important to us personally and to pursue that fully with our energy and spirit.

“If what’s most important to you is being regularly patted on the back for good behavior or avoiding punishment for bad behavior (such infractions such as too much independence), you’ll never be able to reveal your true self in this most intimate of all relationships.  Indeed, you won’t even know what true self there is to reveal.”

Until each of us reaches the point where we decide that we are truly valuable and worthy just as we are, even with our many short-comings and flaws, we will continue to listen way too much to the the critical voices of society and our inner selves that remind us of all the ways we fail to measure up to expectations.

These critical inner voices continually tell us that we are not deserving of a fulfilling life free from abuse, controlling relationships and critical fault-finding.  These same voices urge us to cling to what is familiar and avoid taking the risk of going it alone.

When it comes to risk and reward, have you decided if discovering your true self is worth navigating through uncharted waters?


Discovering True Self

Please let me know your thoughts in the Comments Section below.


  1. That is the beauty of life is learning the answers to all of these questions about if we are living as our try selves. My hope is that each person can come to the point where they can truly answer that question and make the changes they need to make if they aren’t.