Texting During Divorce

Communicating through DivorceIs your spouse making you so angry and upset you want to fire off a text to get your feelings out?

While texting your thoughts now may make you feel better for the moment, it could cause you huge headaches later if it becomes used against you during your divorce.

According to a March 2012 article based on a survey from the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML), ” A resounding 92% of the nation’s top divorce attorneys say that they have seen an increase in the number of cases using evidence taken from iPhones, Droids, and other smart phones during the past three years…”

Information from text messages is being used to highlight irresponsible spending habits, problems with parenting, anger issues,  and even providing direct evidence that contradicts sworn testimony made by either party during depositions or at court.

“Text messages can be particularly powerful forms of evidence during a divorce case, because they are written records of someone’s thoughts, actions and intentions,” said Ken Altshuler, president of AAML.

Some judges are skeptical about what process was used to acquire the texts and some states only accept electronic evidence if it has been obtained by a professional such as a private investigator. However, it is critical to ask your attorney at the very beginning of your divorce how often attorneys in your area subpoena texts to use as evidence for their cases and how the local judges view this form of evidence.  Also be sure to find out what guidelines your attorney recommends that you follow when texting or posting to social media sites to protect your information from being used against you during the divorce process.

Since divorce is such an emotional firestorm, it may be best to avoid texting or posting online on your social media sites while your divorce case is pending and some people even delete their accounts altogether during this time.

What do you think about the issue of texts and social media posts used as evidence during divorce?





Please let me know your thoughts in the Comments Section below.


  1. Wow, that is really interesting Nancy! It makes complete sense, but is not something many people would consider especially in the heat of the moment.

    Louise x

  2. Shanna F. says:

    Very insightful information! I would say that if you do want to text your spouse, perhaps save the text as a draft and wait a day or two, then decide whether or not it should be sent once you’ve had some time to think about it.

  3. It’s stuff like this that makes me *very, very grateful* that texting wasn’t very popular when I went through my divorce. Man, like the courts have nothing better to do than sift through endless lists of text messages, it’s really sad how petty everything becomes in a divorce.