Parenting Plans that Lead to Less Conflicts Later On

 

Is your Parenting Plan working?

Is your Parenting Plan working?

Are you trying to navigate through the challenges of both divorce and starting to co-parent the kids?

If you are going through a divorce that includes children, it’s essential to put together a Parenting Plan that both meets your children’s specific needs and that does not end up leading to on-going conflicts with your children’s other parent.

Without a Parenting Plan that is very specific and detailed in writing, you can find yourself in the kind of frequent arguments with your soon-to-be ex that makes the Middle Eastern countries look cooperative with each other.

Putting together a Parenting Plan that works well over the long-term is not just a challenge when it comes to deciding about which practical things to include and how to put these specific details in writing.

A  Parenting Plan that leads to less conflicts needs to be written extremely clearly so that both parents will find it easier to make the challenging transition from relating to each other as a married couple to   divorced parents who  are beginning to learn how to co-parent together effectively.

 How to  Put Together a Parenting Plan with Fewer Conflicts:

  1. The plan addresses how to meet each child’s needs— outlining specific times with each parent and extended family, time with peers, holiday and vacation arrangements, their school schedules, how to handle days off from school and who will be providing the children’s transportation back and forth. Also be sure to include extracurricular activities such as sports, church, clubs, and music lessons and other activities that each of the children participates in.
  2. Make sure that the plan clearly states how often the parents will agree to review the plan and what specific steps they will follow if either wishes to revise it. Many parents choose to review their plan every two years and depending on the ages of the children and their stages of development, the parenting plan may need to be reviewed more often.
  3. Your parenting plan should specify which parent will be held financially responsible for what percentage of each child’s expenses. These include medical, dental and vision insurance and un-reimbursed expenses, clothing needs, school expenses, the costs of child care and after-school activities and sports equipment and fees.  Also, don’t forget to include clear wording about how each parent will share the costs for summer child care, vacations, camps and anticipated future expenses such as orthodontia, cell phones, cars, auto insurance and college costs.
  4. Include specific consequences about what will happen if the parenting plan terms are not followed. Both parents should know up front about what the consequences will be for not following the plan—especially if this becomes a pattern of behavior that continues over time.
  5. When you do have a disagreement, carefully consider the timing of when you’ll bring it up to the other parent and strive for a business-like approach in a neutral place if you decide to meet in person. These steps are just some of what you’ll need to know to put together a Parenting Plan you can live with long-term that will lead to fewer conflicts with your ex.

Could you and your children both benefit if you get some one-to-one guidance putting together your Parenting Plan?

Call Divorce Strategist and Co-Parenting Coach Nancy Kay today at (740) 919-1248 and get started right!

 

 

 

 

Please let me know your thoughts in the Comments Section below.

Comments

  1. Sure wish my parents had one of these each time they divorced!

  2. One of the things I write in my memoir is how people in my mom’s family expected her to be an ideal mother despite a divorce. Women don’t have it easy and it’s nice to see how things are progressing in this direction.

  3. Hi Nancy,

    As someone who works with stepfamilies on occasion, I can only nod my head in complete agreement. The more solid the parenting plan, the better off the kids and the parents will be. When there’s less ambiguity, everyone benefits.